My most current design project...

I've never been hired to do an illustration before. And I wasn't really in this case either. But I was hired to design 4 children's book covers- of books written by children. Here is one work in progress. I'm trying to figure out how to best add color to it in photoshop. I like the hand-drawn look but want it to be professional as well. Thoughts?

Falling

The dusky colors of fall and spring always capture me. Slightly desaturated but still intense.

 

This past weekend I read "The Secret Garden." It may have been the second time, but it was amazing nonetheless. I love children's novels. Ignore the fact that they say "Ages 9 and up" on the back, they're amazing. Anyway, the books focuses on how creating a garden transformed the children's lives. I can definitely relate, as just a few hours out on the farm today was healing, calming and hopeful. 

Portland

I'm usually disappointed by talked-up places when I finally see them in real life. But Portland has been an exception. It's funny to think that I have been against traveling within the US and then this summer took me to Phoenix and Portland. The states have proven to me that domestic travel does have it's thrills. 


Portland is a fun mix of creativity, random nooks and transplanted people. Nearly everyone I've crossed paths with is here from somewhere else. Many have just moved here. That has made it a pretty approachable city for me. People are really friendly and kind. The fashion sense is quirky and individualized, so it's not intimidating. It seems that most people are trying to establish themselves- so it's like the first week of college- everyone meeting each other and open to new friendships. 


Visited McMenamins Kennedy School last night for dinner and drinks. I loved the whimsical air of the school converted to restaurant, theater, pool and community center. I stopped in to several more of the McMenamins locations and all of them carry elements of a child's fairy tale. I love children's books and young adult novels (Newberry award winners) so I was in love with the McMenamins settings right away. I quickly found out the couple I went out shared similar tastes- and we talked about The Fall, Pan's Labyrinth, The Brothers Grimm and other stories. 


I stopped in a bunch of little craft boutiques and picked up some letterpress cards at Powell's bookstore. The hostel I'm staying is a great old victorian home (bottom left picture in collage). So I will leave here tomorrow with plenty of inspiration- and hoping that I can come back, maybe to live! 

Recently

I love fall and all of it's flavors. When I found plumbs for only 20 cents a pound, I bought a bunch and then realized I had never cooked with them. So I experimented with a few recipes and came up with this combo: Blueberry + plumb tart. It was amazing (I was told!).

Recent Craftings

Who says altered and re-purposed embroidered string pictures can't be stylish? The words say: "This land was made for you and me." A not-so-slight commentary on American history. I'm enjoying this new trial of sarcastic/ironic crafting. See the bottom for a shot of the whole picture.

* I do have to note, that I did not make the original picture. I picked it up at a thrift store. I just did the handy alterations :)

The house of sticks collapses

I am reaching my limit for living out of  a suitcase. Each day I wake up and rustle through my pile of wrinkled clothes for something half-way decent to wear. Although, why do I care what I look like? I could wear anything I guess.

My bed is nestled between boxes. I cleared a small path so I can squeeze through to reach it. That's what happens when you insulate your attic, and lose all storage space, while simultaneously having two grown children move all of their belongings back into your house.

The surest path to insanity is disorganization. So although I no longer need to pay $2.95 for this 8oz latte to give me internet access, I am now paying $2.95 for this latte to give me a little sanity. Sanity in the form of a clean open space where I can walk without tripping.

And today is even blustery and rainy. Though as I was sitting at a red light, nice and crabby, I watched a woman biking through the rain with her grocery bags in tow. She flashed me a kind smile as I backed my car up to let her pass. Now if she is smiling, how can I complain?

"For these light and momentary trials are achieving for us a glory that far outweighs them all." 2 Corinthians 4:17

An Open Day Becomes a List

Last night I had a medium latte, which I believe has 2 shots of espresso. Well, those very shots are still coursing through the synapses of my brain and keeping me from sleep.  As my mind was racing crazily it thought through many ideas and impressed one upon me. Writing a novel.

I have already begun the first chapter and I'm quite excited. I will, perhaps, tell you more about the concept after I have let it percolate a little bit more. For now you'll have to wait in suspense. Thank you Erik for being a sort of "creative-muse" and helping me to even consider the idea of writing.

Now at exactly 5:19am I'm still jazzed with energy and I've finished eating a handful of strawberries and a piece of peanut buttered bread. Hopefully that will dull the effects of the delayed but swift strike of caffeine.

On to list writing. I have several ideas of things I would like to do to take advantage of my no-end-in-sight free days. I will list them here in the hopes of nameless accountability. Since I'm really not sure that anyone reads this, and in all reality I'm quite okay with that.

1. Writing the novel. The premise of the story line is just too good to pass up. It will of course be a young adult novel in the style of Elizabeth George Speare my absolute favorite. (Bronze Bow, The Sign of the Beaver, The Witch of Blackbird Pond).

2. Reupholstering 2 chairs. We have two mid-century arm chairs in our basement that are currently covered in a horrid pea green velvet. My mom and I are going to take on this adventure together. She, having taken an actual upholstery course, will be my tutor.  Then I will hopefully reap the rewards of the labor by having two new chairs for my imaginary new apartment.

3. Sewing. Now I hope that reupholstering two chairs will fulfill my sewing requirement? Otherwise I must put to use the lovely, generous graduation/birthday gifts I was given of a seamstress dressmaker's dummy and the beautiful stainless steel sewing scissors. I have a 1940s tie-necked blouse in mind.

4. Blog/website. This has been a goal for quite awhile. First of all I must register my domain name, which I hope hasn't been stolen by someone who doesn't even appreciate it's wittiness. I can't share the name here in case you might steal it.

5. Cello. I want to relearn to play the violin but first pick up the cello. I may literally only pick it up a few times. But I want to see how hard it is. The deeper, richer tones of cello draw me in more than the violin.

6. Finding a job. Haha! I guess I should add that too this list. But since I am in a delusional, half-sleep state I am only making a list of creative, romantic, the-world-is-all-about-indulging-my-whims things to do. Finding a job! Who needs one? Well, all of us who are not independently wealthy I guess.

I'm hoping I have convinced my brain that it wants sleep now. Maybe, brain? Maybe? If not I will stare at my ceiling a bit longer. What do you think of my list?

The Adventure of Open Time

What do you do with an open day?

When faced with endless activity, I look to an end point somewhere up ahead where I steal a moment of rest. Until that point I hold my breath. I keep holding it to the point where my mind starts spinning and spiraling into itself. My lungs start to expand and contract to simulate breathing, but I kept my mouth shut so that no air can enter. I hold it until I start to bend over because of the heaving and blackness slides over my sight. Just at the last second I fling my mouth open and gasp for breath. How close was I that time?

Weekends were my gasp of breath between days, and sometimes weeks, of insane activity. I would wake up in the morning and quickly review what I had to get done. I'd realize there was no chance of a break until I returned to the bed where I was now making that list. Another day of gulping down food while sitting at my desk multi-tasking.

A brain without oxygen starts to slow down.  It's a very subtle process. You feel tired a lot. You realize that your brain is like a hand or leg that's fallen asleep. You touch it and prod it and feel nothing, only a lump of flesh. It takes longer than normal to process simple information. Things like names and simple facts make you stop to jump start your memory. After you do this for long enough you start to feel like you are choking. If you don't get oxygen soon, then everything will go black.

But open days rush in with too much oxygen too quickly. You start to hyperventilate and your lungs overwork themselves bringing in too much air.

Now my brain is shutting down because of too much open time. It's in a coma of free-time. Too protect itself it's hibernating in apathy. I have to slow down, start moving more slowly. Let my lungs start to relax so they are no longer pumping in so much oxygen. Too much oxygen is poisonous. I need to let it seep in so my mind can learn to function on its new diet.

Wandering

I push down with all of my weight to compact everything together and stuff everything in as tightly as possible. My week is the suitcase holding together too many events, too much of life. It spills out the sides sometimes through tears or a misplaced sentence. I wish for rest, but the next moment I'm thankful for it. At least the constant barrage keeps me from processing things like leaving.

I just left Madison yesterday. I might go back. Not sure yet.
My dad said that since I was a hall director, he knew I could handle it. But when the call that wakes you comes from your grandmother yelling for help, rather than a duty phone, it's very different. My grandpa keeps saying how he wants to live until the end of his life in his own house. But now that's not possible. I hope they at least medicate him to the point that he doesn't know what's happening. As I was searching through the neighborhood to find him in the middle of the night, I was so angry. Why did he have to get to this point? Why is life so painful, with only small punctuations of happiness and cheer? I think even in the most happy of moments life leaves a bitter aftertaste.

At least life is the most of hell I will ever have to taste.

"¹⁴ People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. ¹⁵ If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. ¹⁶ Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them." Hebrews 11:14-16

Highly Educated and Unemployed

I paid my $2.58 for my internet access in the form of an  iced-passion-tea-lemonade from Starbucks. I'm already out of my element in two ways. First, I'm typing this entry on a PC and clearly not in the inner circle in this coffee shop (and likely city) of all Apple users. I do salute them, I will have one in a few weeks. Second, I'm at Starbucks. When I'm in a new city my first priority is generally finding a nice local coffee shop. I did try. I found one with great screen printed posters in the entry, but it closes at 8pm. I will go there tomorrow for my daily internet fix.

Hmmm... Madison. I know I'm in a pretty good neighborhood since Trader Joe's is less than 2 miles away. I've spotted some interesting places to set about exploring. There's a Macha Tea House (Maki come visit!). Of course I'm one block from the endless bike trail that winds from east to west. But since I don't yet have my bike, I will have to endure the glares from haughty bikers who suspect I hate the environment as I drive my car. I've also been thrown back in to a hot bed of politics. Nearly every other house has a "Impeach Walker" sign up, or if you are really committed you put those signs in your car window or wear them on your body. I must confess though that the sight of kayaks strapped to cars does warm my heart. There are lakes and forests less than a mile from my Nakoma neighborhood.

In an earlier entry I posted pictures of my grandparent's house (that's where I am). I love everything about it. Just yesterday I was whipping up an angel food cake with my grandmother's 60 year old handmixer. Bliss...
I also already met Roberta, the neighbor across the street. She and I are set to have wine sometime this week. What a lovely lady. She has her PhD in education and works as a school administrator, so I can't wait to pick her brain. She also has a fascinating house and garden. Apparently her house used to be the Madison zoo keeper's house before it was moved to it's current neighborhood. Her gardens are so amazing she should be featured in "Better Homes and Gardens." I will post pictures later.

Sue told me a few days ago that I am never still and always moving. "Fastforward" has been my speed for the last 3 years. So, being jobless, and homeless, is causing me to slow down a bit. So far I've slept a lot. But to fend off apathy, I will be getting back into job and life searching this very evening. Hence why I'm here.